El Chupacabra Backstage Segment

by El Chupacabra Wed May 13, 2015 2:09 am

As a commercial for yet another energy supplement ends, a loud booming noise starts and MWA's backstage announcer and former joshi star Sara Sanderson appears on screen. She is standing in the back, impatiently waiting outside of one of the arena's locker rooms, intermittently banging the side of her balled up fist on the door.

She looks to the camera and suddenly realizes she's live. 'Damn it Steve at least give me a sign when were coming back from commercial.', she thinks to herself as she smooths out the wrinkles in her grey plaid skirt and suit jacket and brings up the microphone.

"Sara Sanderson here for MWA, trying to track down the monster El Chupacabra and get some serious answers about the brutal attack last week on our valiant backstage cameraman Steve. Unfortunately he has barricaded himself into this locker room and so far me and Steve have had absolutely no luck in making out way inside or even getting anything other then muffled growls and groans from him through the door. We do know he is in this particular room, he apparently tried to pay a janitor in candy to get him churros from concessions, who then came to us and positively identified the monster as El Chupacabra."

There is a click as the door unlocks and the sudden sound startles Sara. She shakes slightly. Steve shivers. The door opens. Steve points the camera inside and Sara shifts to keep in frame. There is a bright light and its glare and luminance blocks the camera's view of inside the locker room.

Suddenly a large form jumps into the hall from inside the room. The camera catches only a green blur as the light continues to obscure. A gruff voice, with a thick Hispanic accent emanates from the blur.

"Okay Selena you cut the lights! You're blinding us all out here!" Sara's microphone catches a faint bleating as the light cuts out and Chupacabra is revealed, striking a very Sailor Moon-esque pose and wearing a lime green schoolgirl uniform. He circles his arms dramatically and then suddenly points at the camera.

This whole situation startles the injured Steve, and the camera jars slightly. El Chupacabra yells out, still pointing directly into the lens.

"Muscle Girl and RJ Dias Jr! You are low down dirty dogs, servants of the evil forces and in the name of the Blood Moon I will be defeating you!"

Sara looks unfazed, she saw weirder stuff in Japan. She decides to forgo her original line of questions and hit on the unfolding developments.

"So El Chupacabra I assume you're dressed like this for your tag-team match with Kittie against the volatile team of Muscle Girl and RJ Dias Jr?"

"Yes, I am big fan of Kittie's work. I have all her albums on cassette."

"Are you worried that Muscle Girls weird, gross steroidy body might be too much for the both of you too handle, let alone adding RJ Dias into the mix?"

"Muscle Girl lacks one important muscle, her heart, comprende?"

"Some would say that, but what about RJ Dias Jr. He's a star that has cemented his spot in the contendership rankings for the MWA TV Title. How have you prepared for his high flying style?"

"I have heard stories about he trained himself wrestling the farm animals, so I gave my sweet Selena some of the arm drags. I think I am prepared enough."

"Thank you El Chupacabra, and remember folks, at MWA 5 El Chupacabra and Kittie will face each other, no matter the outcome of the match here tonight. He talked before about how he was a huge fan of Kittie's work, will he be able to face her in the ring? We'll all have to find out then. But now let's focus on tonights event and send it back to Justin Cole."